Choice of career

I have always had a passion for life and gamingly try new experiences. As for interests, I count too many. The first career I recall wanting to have was to be a forensic scientist (read: CSI). That was just because of an offhand comment by my maths teacher that forensic scientists earn a lot as few would want such a job and it is interesting investigating into questionable deaths. Unfortunately, my secondary school struck such a path off from my life by saying no-no to my doing biology. Agreeably, I didn't make much of a protest since I have always been one to go with the flow and avoid confrontations. They had a basis in any case, my grades were not exactly top-notch, could a lackadasical student ever make it to medicine?

Next up on the list of dream jobs was to be an architect. The work of architects has so much to do with our lives in general, besides the obvious aesthetics, they need to consider what is most beneficial to humans in terms of our living spaces, freedom of movement, hygiene, comfort, lighting etc. They can work with so many different materials and work with so many people from different arenas to coordinate the culmination of the building. Unfortunately again, I didn't really think beforehand of what was required for the course and was glaringly short of a portfolio. The possibilty of not making the cut from draughtsman to trainee architect also was frightening, the distinction would be too great. Cost was also a big factor, for most of the projects, a lot of money had to be spent to acquire the necessary materials and fun though the projects may be, they jabbed deep into the purse.

So there we have it, I was 18 with two dream jobs vanquished like soap bubbles. I started to become even more impractical and thought of taking a degree in dancing. I have a natural gift for dancing and a passion for music but no money to pay for it. I didn't want to let my parents pay for something that could be a bad investment.

So what was left were the safe choices. Business, engineering and the new field of computer science. My dad had the belief that I would have the best future (read: make devilishly good money) in this line so there was that. Easy-going me was open to any challenges.

Now with a honours degree under my belt and 4 years of working in IT, I do question whether I should have been more insistent on pursuing my dream job. I cannot say I regret going into this line as I have learnt and enjoyed learning what it offers, I always liked to work my brains. The creativity employed might not always be artistic, but I do like finding new ways of getting around a problem. IT is all about solutions. It is a tool to make life easier, even though when it is badly done, it is as irritating as a sore back. There is less to say about the ones making the solutions. Incredible satisfactions come with the end product, but we architects of the software really do suffer at times. The hours are inhuman, especially if you have clients who support shift work. As professionals, we do not get paid overtime, yet with the work we do, we should be called labourers. I question if it is all worthwhile. Stability is a key to happiness for me, I do not want to be destitute and hence the safe option of slogging for dollars. Yet I do want the decency of planning life outside of work to do things I want, like learning Gu Zheng, chinese medicine, take up a design course, charity work, hanging out with friends, travelling, hiking, diving etc. There is so much to life to explore outside of work. Religious practice is especially important for me, the peace and well-being felt during practice is undescribable, I truly believe the ultimate happiness it will lead me to.

The question is now however, am I happy now? There are moments where I feel stressed or gloomy, but on the whole, I am ok. If I catch myself ruminating over some uncomfortable matters, I will try to look at something pleasant, like a beautiful flower, trees or the blue sky and think how lucky I am to be able to enjoy such simple pleasures. In the end, when required to, we can only do our best in our work, but let's not stress ourselves out thinking about the same problem when it is past or when we are not working. Smell the flowers, I say!